Sheriff: Enjoy. We are currently working on extensive development of new sections of the Stupid Patrol. Check back often to see the changes – including a New Stupid Jokes area, a stupid video’s section and a Stupid Games area.

First Class Blondie

A beautiful young blonde woman boards a plane to LA with a ticket for the coach section. She looks at the seats in coach and then looks ahead to the first class seats. Seeing that the first class seats appear to be much larger and more comfortable, she moves forward to the last empty one.

The flight attendant checks her ticket and tells the woman that her seat is in coach. The blonde replies, “I’m young, blonde and beautiful, and I’m going to sit here all the way to LA.”

Flustered, the flight attendant goes to the cockpit and informs the captain of the blonde problem. The captain goes back and tells the woman that her assigned seat is in coach.

 Again, the blonde replies, “I’m young, blonde and beautiful, and I’m going to sit here all the way to LA.

“The captain doesn’t want to cause a commotion, and so returns to the cockpit to discuss the blonde with the co-pilot.

The co-pilot says that he has a blonde girlfriend, and that he can take care of the problem. He then goes back and briefly whispers something into the blonde’s ear.

She immediately gets up, says, “Thank you so much,” hugs the co-pilot, and rushes back to her seat in the coach section. The pilot and flight attendant, who were watching with rapt attention, together ask the co-pilot what he had said to the woman.

He replies, “I just told her that the first class section isn’t going to LA.”

Submit your stupid jokes! We love reading them, publishing them, and lauging at the stupidity behind them. And we always give credit where credit is due – submit your joke with your link (within reason – no SPAM!) and we will publish the joke and link.

 Share now!

If youre going to wear them, then practice walking in them first! Funnnny Video!

 Share now!

Mickey Dee's next incarnation!

Would you like some drugs with that?

 A Charleston, S.C., teen says he was given a loaded handgun and bags of marijuana in his McDonald’s drive-thru order, WCSC-TV reports. The 18-year-old and his cousin received the .45-caliber handgun and the pot on Aug. 29 at a McDonald’s on Savannah Highway.

“The gun and the marijuana was inside of a brown bag sitting inside of a McDonald’s bag,” said Kathy Rivera, the mother of the teen. “And they noticed they had three bags, and there were only two people in the car, so when he opened it, he noticed it.”

 The gun and drugs were meant for the car behind theirs in the drive-thru line, police said. The car followed the young men to a gas station, where one man approached the teen and demanded he give them the McDonald’s bags, which the teen did. He told his mother about the incident the next day, and she contacted the restaurant.

 A police report was filed. Charleston police state they’re still investigating, though no arrests have been made.

Sheriff: So the question here is – We have all received at times a bag of Stupidity in Drive Thru’s. Food order not complete, extra stuff given. What was the stupidest thing you ever got with your order?

 Share now!

What the heck are they doing in School?

OKLAHOMA CITY — Only one in four Oklahoma public high school students can name the first President of the United States, according to a survey released today.

 The survey was commissioned by the Oklahoma Council of Public Affairs in observance of Constitution Day on Thursday.

 Brandon Dutcher is with the conservative think tank and said the group wanted to find out how much civic knowledge Oklahoma high school students know. 

The Oklahoma City-based think tank enlisted national research firm, Strategic Vision, to access students’ basic civic knowledge.

 ”They’re questions taken from the actual exam that you have to take to become a U.S. citizen,” Dutcher said.

 A thousand students were given 10 questions drawn from the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services item bank. Candidates for U.S. citizenship must answer six questions correctly in order to become citizens.

 About 92 percent of the people who take the citizenship test pass on their first try, according to immigration service data. However, Oklahoma students did not fare as well. Only about 3 percent of the students surveyed would have passed the citizenship test.

 Dutcher said this is not just a problem in Oklahoma. He said Arizona had similar results, which left him concerned for the entire country.

 ”Jefferson later said that a nation can’t expect to be ignorant and free,” Dutcher said. “It points to a real serious problem. We’re not going to remain ignorant and free.”

 Share now!

Gunther von Hagens and his wife Angelina Whalley show corpses prepared using a technique invented by von Hagens called “plastination,” that removes water from specimens and preserves them with silicon rubber or epoxy resin.

“It’s not my intention to show certain sexual poses. My goal is really to show the anatomy and the function,” Body Worlds creative director Whalley told Reuters in an interview, adding the sex exhibition may open next year.

Body Worlds exhibitions, visited by 27 million people across the world, have been criticized for presenting entire corpses, stripped of skin to reveal the muscles and organs underneath, in lifelike and often theatrical positions.

Von Hagens has already triggered uproar with a new exhibit which shows just two copulating corpses.

German politicians called the current “Cycle of Life” show charting conception to old age “revolting” and “unacceptable” when it showed in Berlin earlier this year because it included copulating cadavers.

The way a plastinate is exhibited can vary from country to country to reflect local sensibilities. A vote of local employees decided that one of the copulating female cadavers should wear fewer clothes in Zurich than was the case in Berlin.

“Switzerland is the first country that already said from the outset that we could show whatever we wanted,” said von Hagens.

“Zurich is ready … but it’s maybe not so easy in every other town,” he said. “We have discussed whether it is proper to show homosexuality and in what way. This is a very delicate subject.”

Von Hagens and Whalley said they both intended to donate their bodies for plastination, but would not leave instructions about how to display them, dismissing this as vanity.

Plastintated Human Specimen

“I find it a great opportunity to give something to others by donating my body, namely self-awareness,” said Whalley.

Von Hagens said he and some other body donors even saw plastination as an alternative to burial or cremation, giving them more certainty about would happen to their bodies after death.

“Cremation for me is hell,” he said.

 Share now!

Veronica Hope Viani, 22, 3030 Golden Gate Blvd., managed to expose her breasts while handcuffed, according to an arrest report. She yelled that she was offering a free peep show, a deputy wrote.

Viani was arrested at Nemo’s, a bar in Woodside Bowl, 8525 Radio Lane, where she had been disruptive earlier in the night, according to the report.

The report gave the following details:

Viani nearly struck a husband and wife with her car in the parking lot, swore at them and asked if they wanted to fight. She went into the bathroom and began punching walls.

After her arrest, Viani was placed in the back of a Sheriff’s Office cruiser, where she began banging her head into the partition. Her belligerence continued through her booking, when staff had to place a spit mask over Viani’s head.

She was arrested on charges of disorderly intoxication and resisting arrest.

From the Naples News - Naples, FL

 Share now!